#7 Heartfelt Journey to Self-Love | Self-Empowerment
What is Self-Empowerment?
Choosing to take charge of and responsibility for your life by acting to create the life you really desire, without apology or requiring the approval of others.
Image - Rowan Kyle
Self-Empowerment/ Self-Esteem....what is the difference?
There is a marked difference between Self-Esteem and Self-Empowerment. Many people tend to get the two confused, although they are indeed very close but there is a marked difference.
Self-Esteem is having the belief that you can do and achieve anything your heart desires.
Self-Empowerment is the ability to actaully take action and go for what you want, no matter what.
Thinking about the two, can you say you are in charge of your life?
Are you sure?
Sovereignty
What has sovereignty got to do with Self-Empowerment? Good question....
A Self-Empowered person takes the reigns of their own lives. They choose to reign over themselves, not by someone else. 'Reign' being the perfect word to express the energy and essence of a truly EMPOWERED woman. Like a queen, she is a sovereign being, presiding over her own kingdom - which is herself.
A sovereign woman has the utmost authority over her choices and her life – present and future. She chooses how to live her life; giving no one that power over her. A woman with sovereignty needs no other person to complete her. She knows that if she needs resources, she will find them. She is not needy, co-dependent, or in need of others’ acknowledgment or approval. She never makes the choice to feel like a victim.
Stepping into your Power
Imagine if you lived your life as the queen of your own domain. The queen of your destiny. The queen of your decisions. The monarch of your dreams. Imagine courageously leading your own life, being willing to step over, and step past, the fear and limiting beliefs of others and into the glory of the life you know you were meant to live.
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How would you be different? How would your life be different? How would you more completely be your powerful self?
Choosing to own your power and wield it with love and courage is a branch of self-love that you, like every woman, must face at some point in your life, or you will never live the life you were meant to live. You must be willing to stand on your own, as the queen of your life, sovereign, independent, and empowered, doing as you see fit, even when it doesn’t align with the vision others have for you. True queens
Lead from their hearts
Have visions of what they want to accomplish
Act courageously
Trust their own consciences above all else…and they act accordingly
Me Moment
How are you giving away your power?
Of course, no one wants to admit that they see themselves as powerless, that they give away their power to others or are afraid to be powerful, but that is what all of us with weak self-empowerment branches do. Whether you want to admit it or not, the truth is if you are consciously or unconsciously making choices that give away your power. The only way to stop is to admit the truth to yourself first. Hold an honesty hearing with yourself, looking truthfully into each of the following three areas to find the places where you are undermining your own sovereignty and empowerment.
1. In what ways or areas do you feel powerless? Look at the major areas of your life, such as finances, career home, health and relationships. Where do you feel like you have no ability to change your reality? That no matter how much you try or how much you do, nothing will change? Or do you feel that because of the circumstances you find yourself in, you can do nothing to alter the state of your life?
Act of Empowerment
List all the ways in which you feel powerless today or have felt powerless in the past, using the following structure:
“I feel powerless to….even though I know….”
2. Who or what have you given your power to? Perhaps you have convinced yourself that you could not survive or thrive without this person, this group of people, or the establishment you have connected yourself to. You believe – consciously or unconsciously – that they have things you need things you cannot provide for yourself. This might be unconditional love, financial security, acceptance, recognition, stature, safety, stability, intimacy, affection, health care, and so on. You allow the opinions and support of these people and your connection to and reliance on them, to prevent you from doing what is truly right for you.
Act of Empowerment
Make a list of all the people, groups, and establishments you have given your power away to – past and present. Then for each, answer these two questions:
What do you believe they can give you that you cannot give yourself?
What are you afraid you will lose or be unable to gain if you disconnect or distance yourself from them or make a decision that goes against their wishes, expectations, or standards?
3. In what ways have you not stepped into your power? Perhaps you are not actively creating your life but are passively letting life happen to you, waiting for your big break. Or you may have simply become resigned to the idea that this is how life is. You coast along, dabbling in your dreams but never fanning the fire inside and going for your dreams. You go through life unheard and unseen, except on the rare occasions when you get so tired of holding back that you burst with emotion, and usually not in a graceful way. You are afraid of your power, and – whether you like to admit it or not – are a mere courtier instead of a queen.
Act of Empowerment:
List all the actions you have wanted to take, but haven’t, in the past ten years. And for each one, list the truth of why you didn’t take it. What stopped you? Complete the following sentences:
“I was afraid I couldn’t….” Articulate what you were afraid you could not do for yourself.
“I was afraid I wouldn’t….” Say what you would have gone without or lost if you had done it.
“I was afraid others would think….” List what you believe other would have thought of said if you had done it.
As a last step, take a step back and look at all you have discovered about yourself while having this ME Moment. Ask yourself the following questions:
How does all this make me feel? Use a feeling word, not a judgement: “I feel….” (sad, mad, excited, scared and so on).
What circumstances would I like to be different from what I see now?
What needs to shift for me to recognise that I complete myself, and that there is nothing anyone can give me that I cannot receive from myself?
Am I willing to make my life different, to empower myself to change it?
Remember, all you have to be, is willing.
Take Your Power Back: Reclaim Your Sovereignty
No one can give you anything or empower you with anything that you have not already given yourself. This is the bottom line of self-empowerment. With sovereignty you demonstrate that the power, is within you. You’ve just reexperienced some of the ways in which you have been looking outside yourself to receive the power only you can bestow. This of this as placing a crown of self-empowerment on you own head as token of your sovereignty and your status as chief decision maker in your life.
Enjoy the process. Go slow, be gentle. Be kind to yourself. Trust yourself and reach out if you have anything that comes up that you have trouble moving through.
I look forward to sharing the next Heartfelt Journey with you soon. In the meantime, I invite you to journal what thoughts come up for you, process things and most of all be kind to you.
Until next time, enjoy this Journey and may you love yourself abundantly.
Much Love Cath xx
